Watches on 'Rosy'

I have (or, rather, had) 3 watches on 'Rosy'.  A rather nice 'dress' watch that I wouldn't want to wear as a day to day lock-working watch.  A Festina that Mohammed gave me in Oman, two days before I was due to visit his training institute to check it for compliance.  He was, incidentally, astounded to get a non-compliance report from me, after the visit!  And a Casio G-Shock, which was the watch of choice for the latter part of my military career.  It also performed very well as a diving watch.  I stopped using it when I needed spectacles on before I could read the time - at which point I started using analogue watches.

A month ago, the Festina stopped.  At Ternuzen in Holland I got the battery changed, and a week later it stopped again.  No worries, out came the G-Shock.  After 2 days, there was nothing left of it, except its skeleton - the rubbery, resinous covering had disintegrated.

I was in St Quentain, and was told that the 'horologer' was by the Cathedral.  And it was.  Madame said that the Festina would have to be sent away, and it would take 2 weeks.  Ditto the G-Shock, but why didn't I take it to the Casio shop.  Right, said I, where is it?  She pointed across the narrow street to the shop with a HUGE sign outside it saying CASIO.  This conversation was wholly in French!!  C'est bon, n'est-ce pas? 

Over the road was the man.  Tall, thin and sad looking.  No Casio G-Shock covers :-(  I'll buy a new one then, I said.  He said that he doubted that there was one that I wanted :-(

I said: Casio.  Water resistant.  Cheap.

He produced one.

I said: Fine.  I'll have it.

Now, I quite like twiddling with things and learning about how they work, and, generally, getting on with life at a reasonably brisk pace.

He spent some 10 minutes setting the time, taking as the correct time an electronic clock that is updated every 200th of a second by a radio beacon in Germany, that gets its time by measuring the mean amplitude of resonance of a randomised purified sample of denatured caesium (or some such rubbish).

He then disappeared into the back of his shop, and emerged with a look of suppressed triumph on his otherwise mournful face.  He had found the box.  He proved this to my entire satisfaction by cross-checking the model number on the ticket on the watch with the model number on the sticker on the box, and ensuring that they were both the same.  We did this twice, just to be sure.  Twice, that is, in French, and twice in English, to avoid any confusion.  (It's W 43 H in case you're gagging to know.)

He then opened the box, and took out the instruction booklet, which also has W 43 H on it, but we checked this with the box and the watch, in French and English, just to assure ourselves that all was well.

By this time, I was pretty near to screaming point.  Forget about fiery furnaces and red hot pokers.  Hell is running a watch shop with this chap!! 

He then opened the instruction booklet, and showed me the pages where the English instructions were.  By this, I mean that he showed me the page where it tells you how to set the time, and the page where it tells you how to set the alarm etc. etc. and the page where there is an index that shows you which page to go to for which instruction.  He then showed me that the booklet also includes instructions in Italian, Spanish, French and German.

He then filled out the back of the booklet with the date of purchase, and his name and address, and then he took me through the details of the warranty and guarantee, and showed me where they were all laid out in the booklet, for the benefit of my ease of reference.

He then put the booklet in the box, and spent quite a while setting the watch up on its pedestal in the box - then he took it out again to check that he'd shown me how the backlight works (he had!).  Finally, it was in its box, with the lid closed.

Did I want it gift wrapped? 

Aaaarrrggghhhhhhh!  NO! 

I gave him some money, and he owed me about F1.20 (some 10 pence).  He hadn't got it in his till, nor in his pocket.  His wife (God!!  I felt sorry for her) hadn't got it in her voluminous handbag, but, as I discovered when he reappeared 5 minutes later, the man in the shop next door had.

I felt a strange karma as I left his shop.  I think this was due to the knowledge that never again, in my entire life, can I be as frustrated as I was then.  It was also due to the fact that I felt particularly proud of myself for having resisted the temptation to wring the last scrap of breath and life from out of his body.

Toodle pip!! 

Bill