General Witterings -
Rosy Digs In

Bill, having had what he considers to be a worthwhile life of some luxury but considerable stress, decided to commence his life's ambition rather earlier than planned.  Hence he drastically downsized his life, moved onto the narrow boat Rosy, and is just beginning his fourth year of watery idleness in Europe.  Bill and Rosy are currently over-wintering at Briare (in France).  They have recently been joined/invaded by a stow-away, one Fanny, a woof of the female gender, a border collie by looks and nature ...  Now read on.

Ah!  Before we start, back numbers of these witterings, plus some handy hints on buying boats and boating in Europe, plus some piccies, plus other stuff (including the only known X-rated cookery page on the WWW), can all be found on this website.

ALSO, if you don't receive this by e-mail directly from me (website@billybubbles.demon.co.uk) but would like to, just e-mail me a request, and I'll add you to the direct mailing list.

Right!  Here we go!!!

It's been a bit wet and a bit cold over the past week - typically winter weather, but nothing too drastic.  Nobody told the River Loire about this, as all week she has been rising steadily, reaching a peak yesterday (Friday) when it overtopped the main, natural banks, flooding the metalled, bankside footpath/roadette in places.

Apart from the flooding, various other things happened on Friday, that persuaded Fanny and me to take a longer than usual walk.  Hence we walked across the Briare aqueduct, which, it is believed, is the longest navigable aqueduct in the world (at over 600m). 

Out of interest, its rival, the new aqueduct across the Elbe, is considerably longer than this, and has been built, but the subsidiary works on either side are not yet completed, so it is not yet navigable.  And the Pontywotnot is very much shorter - though very much higher.

The Briare aqueduct (or Pont Canal) has a towing path on either side of the channel.  Having walked across the aqueduct, one can follow a footpath that leads down to a road that passes under the Canal.  Another footpath brings one back up to the aqueduct, so that one can walk back to Briare on the other side of the aqueduct.  Although the road passes under the canal, it is not obvious to boaters, who believe that they are merely atop an embankment that will lead them onto the main aqueduct - whereas, in fact, they are crossing a mini aqueduct.

Underneath the canal, the short tunnel through which the road passes is very nicely conceived in a clean looking stone.  However, the real interest is the gates.  At each entrance to the tunnel is a massive pair of gates, I assume in case of a breach.  Between this tunnel and the main aqueduct, on the northern side, is a large hole in the ground that looks suspiciously like a bomb crater.  Speaking with the locals, it seems that in WW2, all sides had a go at it at one time or another.  The Resistance blew it to counter the war-effort, the Germans fired rockets at it and the Allies bombed it.

I've had a bit of a cold - the dribbly nose variety.  It has been quite useful from a Fanny-training point of view.  Fanny is very much into orifices of all sorts, even pseudo ones - like eyes.  I don't like her licking my eyes, mainly 'cos I wear glasses, and after a licking from Fanny the world tends to go a bit wobbly.  She has made some pretty determined efforts to get her tongue down my throat to my epiglottis, but I find this a bit unhealthy/unreal/unwanted (at my end, of course).  She hadn't really tried my nostrils, so we had sort of compromised on the ears, which is OK, and saves me the task of washing the wax out each morning.  However, having my ears nibbled and tongued, and having her hot breath ...  well, I'm sure you get the picture.  It was all a bit ...  fraught, shall we say.  Anyway, the cold saved me, as Fanny was surprisingly swift at discovering this new source of salty, bodily fluid from her humanoid significant other - namely, moi!!!  Saves on the handkerchief front, as well.

THAMES NOTES:  The nice David Long is a good source of books, and he always brings a few over when he comes to visit Falcon.  The last time he came, he brought 'The Motor Boat Manual, 12th Edition'.  It is undated, but seems to be from 1938 or 39.  It is MOST interesting - how wooden boats are made, lists of engines (Kelvin is included, of course), how to drive your boat etc. etc.  It happens to mention that, in 1936, there were 1,321 craft registered on the Thames, and 1,931 on the Broads.

Thanks to Dot Hart, I've learned that in 2001 (the latest year for which we have data) the number of registered craft was 14,341, composed of:

There were also 4184 'visitors', and a mysterious 2369 'Exempt Craft'.

Has anyone got the numbers of Broads registered craft for 2001? 

Has anyone got the number of BW registered craft for 2001? 

These figures could be quite interesting.

HELP WANTED:  With a reduced need for material goodies, and a reduced income, I no longer take Which? magazine.  My loss, actually, as apart form its product testing, it also gives good, understandable information about new technologies.  Anyway, I'm soon to be in need of a couple of doodahs, and I'd be interested if anyone who reads this has access to the Which? suggestion.

Vacuum cleaner:  I'm making do with a little 'Red Devils' machine, but fancy something a touch more powerful (it's my Fanny losing hairs that's a problem).  I have mains electricity on Rosy, so the standard piece of kit is OK.  The requirements are:

1. Under 1300 watts
2. Does NOT use disposable bags (can be tricky to get in the middle of no-where)
3. Can suck up water.

There is a nice Dyson that does 1 and 2 but not 3, and I believe that there is a Goblin that does all 3.  Any info, in a plain text e-mail, will be most gratefully received.  (Serious note:  Please don't put the word 'suck' in the message subject heading, as your e-mail will be trashed by my anti-porn-SPAM filters).

Printer/scanner/copier:  Which is reckoned to be the bee's knees?  I need one for ordinary documents - I'm NOT looking for photographic quality printing.  I would place emphasis on minimising the cost per page!! 

Thanks in advance.

In this wintery weather, it seems sensible to finish on a beach story.  It concerns one Michael George - a beach bum if ever there was one.  Being a military gent, and in need of funds/excitement, he (sensible chap) went off to be a mercenary in the army of the Sultan of Oman.  I say "sensible chap", 'cos that's what I did too.

Anyway, as his first 'weekend' (Thursday afternoon and Friday in Moslem countries) approached, a friend said to him "Fancy coming on a banyan on Friday?".  Mike obviously said "Yes please" and added "Er ... what's a banyan?'' He discovered that it's a marine picnic.  TITS (That Is To Say), one goes by boat to a deserted beach, lights a barbecue and eats and drinks one's fill.

So, Mike's up in the bows of the boat as it planes over the limpid, blue waters, down the coast for a few miles, on a hot, cloudless day, with the dolphins jumping in and out of the bow wave and a cooling can of Fosters in his hand.  The boat then turns slightly to head into an idyllic cove, about 200m across, with a couple of palm trees at each end.  Under the palm tree at the southern end are a couple already barbecuing.

The boat veers away, to head further down the coast.  Mike is distraught, and says to the chappie at the wheel "Oi!!!  **!!**?!.  Why are you taking away me away from paradise?"

The chappie at the wheel replies "'Cos it's too crowded!" and, indeed, takes Mike et al another half mile down the coast to an empty cove.

Ah!!  Happy days!

Toodle pip!!

Bill