General Witterings -
What Size of Boat Do I Need?

WHAT SIZE BOAT DO I NEED?

Every now and again, I get an e-mail asking this question.  I try to give a helpful and polite answer (honest guv!!), but the question itself seems to me indicative of the fact that that the questioner is not ready for boat ownership - unless they happen to have oodles of money that they are prepared to throw away.

To find out what size boat you need, AND to decide what equipment you want on board, the prospective owner has to do some thinking.

Perhaps the first thing to do is to ensure that one's partners in life (e.g.  FSP / close buddy / associated smalls) (I am led to believe that FSP is a term used by social scientists as an all-embracing, non-sexist term for 'Favourite Sexual Partner') also want to go boating.  To ensure this, one should, at the very least, hire one for a holiday.  The experience of this holiday should lead you to some thoughts about the equipment that you will need on board.  The following notes might help:

• How much time will you spend on the boat?  Only at weekends?  For a week at a time?  Full time live-aboards?
• How many beds do you need, and do these need to be permanent, or can they be other things during the day?  For example, the ubiquitous 'double dinette' can be a four-seater table by day and a double bed by night, whilst bunk beds are traditionally associated with boats.
• What kitchen equipment do you REALLY need?  Space is always at a premium on a boat, so this needs careful thought.  Cooking facilities can vary from a simple one- or two-burner gas (or even paraffin) hob, through a two-burner (plus) gas grill and small oven, via a standard kitchen four-burner plus grill and oven to an Esse (or similar) solid fuel or diesel range.
• What bathroom equipment do you need?  Will a shower suffice, or must you have a bath?  If the latter:

A bath takes more space than a shower.

A bath uses more water than a shower, so it will have implications on the size of the water tank and on the volume of hot water that you can generate.

•  How comfortable are you at dealing with your solid and liquid bodily outgoings?  Insensitive folk can get away with an Elsan system which is cheap to buy and cheap to empty.  Sensitive, but poor, folk should either de-sensitise themselves - or use a cassette system.  Sensitive flowers will need a pump-out system which, I am told, can cost a tenner to empty.
• Food storage probably comes next.  A fridge keeps the beer cold and also stores food.  Some folk demand a freezer as well.  Other, whilst cruising, take the opportunity to use local shops and to eat fresh food, whilst others eat out as often as possible.  Fridges use quite a bit of electricity in a 24-hour period, so the size of the fridge must be within the capability of the electrical system.  Fridges with a Danfoss compressor use much less electricity, but cost considerably more than a common or garden fridge (three or four times as much, I think).
• Washing needs to be considered.  Will you rely on hand washing, or use laundrettes (I believe that the Aylesbury Canal Society has a guide to canal-side laundrettes).  On-board washing machines are desirable, but they need the support of a hunky-chunky (and, hence, quite expensive) electrical system, especially if they heat the water.  I make do with bank-side laundrettes supported by an on-board spin dryer.
• One needs to decide on 'entertainment', a term I loosely apply to TV, radio, cassette, video, records, CD, DVD etc. etc. etc.  If you must have satellite TV, be aware that the 'simple' method of setting up a satellite dish does not take too long to master.  The 'automatic' satellite finders are expensive.  Both types depend on the ability of the dish to see the satellite - buildings and trees can mask the satellite.  When I walk about the boat to make a cup a cup of tea (or w.h.y.) the movement of the boat is not enough to lose the satellite signal.
• If you intend to do any out-of-season cruising, then heating the boat becomes an issue.  This can be done with gas, liquid fuel (diesel, heating oil or paraffin), wood (there's lots of it on the tow path and in the cut), or other solid fuel.  The storage of this fuel needs to be thought about.

At this point, one can think about the two main systems:

• Water systems.  Size of water tank.  How to heat water for washing dishes, bodies and clothes.  Smart folks try to use waste heat from the engine to heat water.
• Electrical systems.  Number of batteries.  Will you stick to a 12 volt system, or will you need to use 240 volt equipment:?  A minority take the trouble to put in a 24volt system.  For 240 volts, you need to think carefully about how to produce it.  Most folk seem to use an inverter, which may have implications concerning the batteries - you'll probably need more of them.  And you'll probably need something better than merely a vehicle alternator to keep them charged-up - on Rosy we have a 70 amp alternator and an extra alternator regulator.  (If starting from fresh, remember that instead of buying a new alternator, it is very much cheaper to acquire a used alternator from a scrap yard, and then part exchange it for a new one).

It is, of course, well worthwhile keeping an eye on the waterway magazines to see what is available.  Remember that the featured boats are nearly always new boats, and hence the cupboards and shelves are empty of normal, everyday necessities and clutter.  Ditto the used boats for sale you look at.

On this website you can find a copy of the check list that I used when visiting boatyards to find a boat.  If you use it, you'll probably have to tweak it to reflect your own wishes, desires and necessities

EFFING KETTLES...

Foolishly, I recently mentioned Rosy's electric kettle.  The kettle obviously got to know about this, as it has now decided to be awkward.  Its lip cover has taken to falling off, and the body has been discoloured by some paint.  It is some six or seven years old, and has a low rating of 500 watts, so it can be run off Rosy's inverter, without necessarily having to shut down every other 240v appliance (so I can carry on computing whilst brewing a cup of tea).  I'm not looking forward to trying to find another one, as such low wattage are a bit like hen's teeth - extremely un-common!!  Incidentally, truck-stop shops are often a good source of 12v equipment - in them, I've seen kettles designed to be plugged into a 12v cigarette lighter socket, and also 12v microwave ovens.

...AND WHINGEING BLOODY POMS

Why are some people so miserable??!!  A British registered boat came onto the mooring a few days ago.  It had been a wonderfully bright and sunny day - in contrast to the wet and windy stuff which had been around for the previous few days.  I wondered about whether to talk to them as he (and older gent) had shouted harsh words to his older (looking) and frailer (looking) female partner when they were coming in to moor.  Anyway, they were sitting out sunning themselves, so I gave them a cheerful 'Hi'.  This sparked him off into a long diatribe about:

• the awful weather we have been having.  (But it's nice now, so why not stop whingeing about it and start to enjoy it?)
• the mooring is too (?) full.  (But he has a space!!!!)
• Many of the boats do not pay their mooring fees.  (How he knows this, I do not know.  Furthermore, it is for the local authority to do something about this - if they so desire).
• He could not moor at another village that he wanted to stop at, because their free moorings were full.

At this point I eased off back to 'Rosy', sure in the knowledge that I could have a very much more worthwhile and interesting conversation with Fanny the Woof, or even the nearby plane tree!!!

Today, they were sitting outside as I walked by, and I got lured into further conversation with them.

He was complaining that if the local authority 'got it together' they could generate electricity from the near-by river, and provide the mooring with free electricity.  I tried to explain that it was already virtually free to us, and that with the nuclear power station two or three miles down the road, electricity was not in short supply in these parts.

He then changed tack to complain that the UK 'government' were closing down nuclear power stations and were not building replacements, and added that it was his wife's birthday, and he wanted to take her into town, but had to wait until a boat filled the berth next to his boat, as in similar circumstances two years ago an incoming boat had badly damaged his lee-board.

I followed Fanny home - she had wisely left pretty soon after we have stopped to talk.

The Transactional Analysis folk call such conversations 'Ain't it awful…' and for some folk (rather too many for my liking) it is their main means of conversing with others.  You can sometimes find folk who will trot through a series of awful things, until they find one that they both agree with, and then they're away, agreeing that it really IS awful.

If one comes across such people, it is (occasionally) great fun to pick up on one of their moans, and to steer the conversation around to try to discuss what WE could do to alleviate the problem.  Some shy away from this, others are willing, at least, to enter into the discussion, but 99.999% will balk at actually doing anything about it.

I suppose that, on the positive side, if we all agree that something is awful, then that, in itself, provides with us with a bond … of sorts.  However, isn't it preferable to bond with people over positive things?  I would much rather belong to a club that is for something rather than one that is against something.

I guess that this is why the canally community is such a success.  We can all enthuse about how s'wonderful and s'marvellous the canals are, and that makes for cheerful, positive relationships.

Toodle pip!!

Bill